Breaking Down The Walls

Tuesday, 3 May 2022



Last year, I never thought I would meet my friend from college and become closer as a friend. It’s been so long since the last time we met. Now we can talk for hours about a lot of things. Well, he actually talks more. I’m just being a good listener most of the times. This has been making me see his other sides that I didn’t know before. Looking back, all I knew was he is a charming guy. Smart and handsome, which I don’t think his handsomeness is something convincing in the moment. What was wrong with me?
 

It amazed me that he is a wise and very caring person. He’s nice and kind to people. He’s funny and knows how to laugh at yourself which I have to learn from him. I like the way he cares for me. He always asks me how I feel and gives genuine advices for my own good. I don’t like to share my feelings to anyone, I prefer keeping them to myself. But with him, I slightly open up about myself and it feels such a relief. I don’t feel judged and he can keep my stories (as far as I know). I kind of hate it when someone tells something I told them to other people. I don’t like being exposed. I like to keep things quiet and low-key. I had no idea I could talk about how I feel to someone. It just came out of my mouth since I felt comforted and consoled. 

Sharing my feelings with him has made me realized that I can actually talk about how I feel and become vulnerable if it’s with the right person. Someone I feel comfortable to be with. I’m very grateful to have a friend like him. I don’t feel alone and the burdens on my chest are slightly removed. 

I always thought that being vulnerable, showing your pain, is weak, pathetic and shameful. I don’t want anyone to see me suffer. In fact, I feel so many good things by being vulnerable. It allows me to be my authentic-self, being honest with my feelings and it feels so damn good that you could be yourself. I learned to build my empathy when sharing my feelings. Lightly, I let down my walls and became more understanding, forgiving and loving. it helped me work through my emotions. I could be aware of what I’m feeling and know why. It gives me courage to embrace and deal with who I truly am and what I’m feeling till I find people who accept me for who I am. 

In spite of that, you can’t just be vulnerable to anyone. We need to find someone we feel comfortable to share our vulnerability. 

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